At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
