yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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