I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize