Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
