and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
