Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Randomize
