I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
