Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
