yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
