Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
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