genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
