p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
