what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Randomize
