Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
