woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
