I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
What drink are we having for lunch?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize