Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize