garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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