wakey wakey hands off snakey
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
they need to just BURY HIM!
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
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