i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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