is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
