I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
