It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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