shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize