i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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