My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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