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Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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