So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Randomize
