He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
