In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
there's paper in my vomit.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Randomize
