My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
