Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
