i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
