And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
