i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Randomize