By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
