So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
