she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
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