I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
