I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize
