I got chris browned last night
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
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