I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I'm too high and old for this...
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize