i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Randomize
