i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
