You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
