that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
