Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
