someone threw a dead crab at me
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
