I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Randomize