im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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