Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
