answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
