look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
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